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Writer's pictureTherapyUnpacked

Playing with Fire

Updated: Oct 5, 2022

Anger is part of all human relationships – trying to eradicate it is not possible or desirable.




Anger is a natural emotion, a boundary setter, a way for each of us to protect ourselves when we feel under attack. Mahatma Gandhi used to say: “Use your anger wisely. Let it help you find solutions of love and truth”.


In the public sphere anger can act as a powerful force, shaking loose entrenched assumptions, sparking conversations and catalysing real change.


But if political anger can be seen as a vital part of a functioning state, it feels like a different story when you have to endure a temper tantrum from a ten-year-old who has been asked to turn off Fortnite. Personal anger is far less accepted. Instead, we treat it as something bad or shameful.


We need to start talking about personal anger and sharing those stories of angry episodes that are a natural part of family life. The more we discuss anger, the more we seek to understand it, the more likely we are to learn how to harness its energy.


When the fire of anger rages uncontrollably it can become the painful force we're fearful of, but when we work with our anger and listen to what it is telling us, it can be an incredibly powerful agent for positive change.

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